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Domestic violence and child custody

If there has been domestic violence in your family, the judge must follow special laws to protect your child when deciding custody. These laws help make sure custody and visitation orders keep children and parents safe.

What counts as domestic violence?

Domestic violence can take many forms. It can be emotional, financial, or physical abuse, and it can happen in person or online.

Someone may abuse you by:

Controlling your money or access to basic needs
Keeping you away from friends or family
Threatening, hurting, or scaring you

How custody works

There are two kinds of custody:

Physical custody means your child lives with you most of the time.
Legal custody means you make important decisions about your child’s health, education, and well-being.

Parents can share custody (joint custody) or one parent can have full custody (sole custody).

The judge decides based on what is in your child’s best interest.

When domestic violence affects custody

Special laws guide how a judge decides custody when domestic violence has happened.

Which law applies depends on:

When the abuse happened, and
Whether a court was already involved.

If a parent has been convicted of domestic violence or committed abuse in the last five years, the judge must follow Family Code section 3044.

This law requires the judge to review specific factors before giving that parent any custody.

In most cases, the judge gives sole legal and physical custody to the non-abusive parent.

The abusive parent may still visit the child, but usually with limits or supervision.

🔗 Learn more: Domestic violence and child custody (Family Code section 3044) (opens in a new tab)

Get the Family Code section 3044 handout in different languages

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If one parent says the other committed domestic violence, the judge must look at the evidence and decide what's best for the child.

If the judge gives the accused parent custody or unsupervised visits, the judge must explain why they decided to do that.

You can tell the judge about domestic violence in your case by completing and filing a Declaration (form MC-030) (opens in a new tab).

Visitation

Types of visitation orders

The court can order different kinds of visitation depending on what is safest and best for your child.

There are four main types of visitation orders:

With a schedule: You and the other parent follow a set schedule with dates and times when your child is with each of you. You can include holidays, birthdays, and vacations.
Reasonable: You and the other parent decide when visits happen. This only works if you communicate well and can be flexible. If you disagree often, this type of order can cause problems.
Supervised: The other parent visits your child while another adult, you, or a professional supervisor is present. Judges use this when there are safety concerns or when a parent and child are rebuilding contact after time apart.
No visitation: The court may order no visits if contact with a parent, even supervised, would harm your child physically or emotionally.

💻 What are virtual visits?

Virtual visits are video calls between a parent and child using an app like Zoom, FaceTime, or WhatsApp. You and your child can see and hear each other in real time.

Courts may allow virtual visits when:

One parent lives far away,
In-person visits aren’t possible, or
Safety concerns make online visits a better option.

Virtual visits can be supervised or unsupervised, and you’ll need internet access and a device with a camera and microphone.

Are virtual visits a good option for your family?

Virtual visits may work well if:

You or your child have safety concerns
One parent lives far away
One parent hasn’t seen the child in a long time

But they aren’t right for every family. Young children may not stay focused on a video call, and some situations may require in-person supervision.

If the court includes virtual visits in your parenting plan, use the worksheet on page 2 of What are Visitation or Parenting Time Orders? (form FL-311-INFO (opens in a new tab) to help plan how the visits will happen.

💬 Get help

If there has been domestic violence in your family:

Find your local self-help center for free legal information.
Talk to a lawyer for legal advice and help with your case.

Key takeaways

Domestic violence can be emotional, financial, or physical.
Judges must follow Family Code section 3044 if there was abuse in the last five years.
The abusive parent may get visitation but usually not custody.
The court can order different types of visitation, including supervised or no visitation for safety.
Virtual visits can help parents and children stay in contact when in-person visits aren’t possible.
You can get free help from your local self-help center.